All my life, my whole life, all I did was this - I relegated decisions so someone could take them for me, so I could blame someone else for my choices., whenever I could.
I can't tell what I want, I rarely ever could, and I'm just sitting waiting wishing around for someone to tell me what it is.
I hate it when people tell me what I can or can't do, but unconsciently I'm relieved when that takes the responsabilitie out of my hands, sometimes.
Of course they always think I'm really responsible and keep my feet on the ground, and at somethings that's how I am, as for others that's just an image I try to keep.
This is like whatever, but.
It's all inside my head, and there are times I just wish I could switch the off button and stop thinking. I try, I open my eyes and I close them hard back hoping it will all go away.
I regret, I don't regret. I want to, I don't want to. I did, no I didn't. I will tell you everything, I need to tell you, I need to let it go! No I won't, no I don't.
No I, no.
This fucking shit is all stumbling inside out of me, and one day it's going to go wrong, one day someone might trip on it.
Whatever, I'll be here, just right here, sitting waiting, watching, laughing - out loud.
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